DAILY at 7PM, Ms Eveline Ndlovu (23) takes her antiretroviral therapy (ART) medication which has kept her alive since a tender age.
Born with HIV, the youth from Redwood in Umguza District in Matabeleland North says she does not see herself different from everyone else.
Born in 1999, two years before Zimbabwe officially rolled out prevention of mother-to-child transmission (PMTCT) meant she did not benefit from medication that was going to ensure she was born HIV-free.
Despite having been born HIV positive, she is one of the few youths who can confidently speak about their status and how hopeful life is for her as Zimbabwe today joins the rest of the world in commemorating World AIDS Day which falls on December 1 annually.
Eveline grew up in Entumbane suburb in Bulawayo and later moved to Triangle in Masvingo province for some time before moving back to Bulawayo.
She was never told about her status and only discovered it after some years of taking medication.
“I was born HIV positive but this was a secret kept behind my back. I got severely sick when I was in grade six, they took me to some hospital and somehow I know I got tested on June 6, 2010. I was 11 by then. The results were positive but my mother did not tell me. She started giving me tablets and emphasised that I should take them daily in the evening. I thought they were for the sickness of that moment, but even after getting better I was told to continue taking the medication,” said Eveline.
At school, I was doing some sporting activities whereby I had to go on some trips. I remember at one point in time I had to go for a drum majorettes trip and my mother said if other learners ask me what those pills are for, I tell them the truth ‘that they are asthma tablets and I have to take them every day so that I do not get sick as I did last time,” said Eveline.
She recalls how her uncle’s wife never wanted her too close to her children.
“I stayed with my uncle’s wife in Bulawayo who knew that my mother and I were HIV positive. I had my own plate, cup, spoon, bath soap and everything which I could not understand as a child. I was stigmatised, no lie, I felt hated and surely they did not want me and her children getting close,” said Eveline.
She said after finishing her Grade Seven at Entumbane Primary School in 2011, her aunt could not take it anymore so she made sure to send her away for secondary school.
She, therefore, went to Mufakose High School in Triangle where she stayed with other relatives while her mother was working in Chiredzi.
She was still taking her ‘asthma’ tablets every day at 7 PM until her cousin one day broke the devastating news to her in 2012 when she was in Form 1.
“One day in 2012 around the evening, my cousin said to me ‘hey you it’s now 7 PM come and take your AIDS tablets.’ I corrected her that they were asthma tablets. That is when she told me the elders had been lying to me all along. I got angry and called my mother asking her about what I had been told, she first denied but my cousin took my phone and told her to stop lying to me. She then admitted that I was positive. The pain, the confusion, the hurt, and the resentment I had for my mother for giving me the disease and on top of my status was too much,” said Eveline.
She developed suicidal thoughts, thinking about how she would not even get married freely and how her choice would somehow get limited.
When she reached her late teenagehood, a stage when her peers were dating, she started hating herself.
She narrated how all her relationships have failed because of her HIV status.
“I was taught that if I ever date, I should always tell them of my status. I then started dating, my relationships never surpassed three months, which is when I would have told the partner about my status. The reactions I got from them made me feel like I’m not human or woman enough. One said I was a walking dead, the other a rotten egg and the other blankly told me that I’m as good as a ghost, I’m dead and no one will ever love me,” said Eveline.
“I got in love with this one guy and decided that I’m not telling this one about my status. And guess what? we surpassed those three months; the relationship was flowing and I thought he was the one as he had started talking about lobola. The secret I had tormented me every day but I enjoyed being loved.
“He then started asking for more and one day I woke up and thought of how much I loved him and how I wouldn’t want him to hate me one day in future for hiding it from him.”
She told him and he said he accepted her as she was and even added that being HIV positive was not a death sentence.
“Acceptance? I was lying to myself, the guy only said that not to hurt me by rejecting me. When a month elapsed the guy was slowly but surely vanishing into thin air while telling me that he can no longer take me as a wife, until he was not talking to me anymore,” she said.
Eveline said this brought her back to square one where she was as hurt as the day she found out about her status. She even decided to default on her medication.
However, she did not default, she went for counselling which helped her fully accept and love herself as she is. She said she now knows that if she is meant to get a suitor who will accept her as she is, he will come along the way. She urged parents not to lie to their children but tell them the truth so that they grow up knowing who they are.
Another youth living positively with HIV is Ms Amanda Ndlovu (23) from Siganda in Bubi District.
She thinks she was born HIV positive as she only discovered her status when she was pregnant in 2017 but her husband is HIV negative.
She went as far as Grade Seven in Matobo because her parents could not afford to pay her secondary school fees. She then came to Bulawayo and worked as a domestic worker until 16 when she was customarily married.
“I worked as a maid for a long time, I left after meeting my husband. In 2017 I got pregnant and that is when I discovered my status. I don’t even know where I got the HIV, maybe I was born with it, I really do not know because my husband is actually negative as we speak,” she said.
Because of a lack of education, Amanda says she never felt any pain when she got to know about her status as she did not know what they were talking about. “I did not know what they meant when they talked of being HIV positive. It took me time to understand until I went for counselling where I was taught about everything,” said Amanda.
She said she thought her husband would leave her but he is still with her every step of the way, always reminding her to take her medication on time.
Amanda now works with Africaid, looking after and advising HIV-positive pregnant and breastfeeding mothers which has now become her passion. – The Chronicle
